Thursday, January 28, 2010

24 Hrs

Well, it has been over 24 hrs. since I last saw, smelled and touched my sweet Decaza. Before we walked into the lower pasture, I cut his tail so that I could have something physically tangible to remember his smell. It has been really tough emotionally as well as physically and I wait for the day when it doesn't hurt my heart so bad.
The aftermath of burrying him is almost as hard as when we lied him down beside his grave. I thought, as we lied together on the cold pasture ground, that I would never heal from this deep wound and loss. I told Decaza I would see him on the other side and asked him to find my other animals and remind them I loved them! Once again, I thought, I will not be able to move forward for quite some time.
If you have ever lost a loved one,(animals do count), time is an amzing thing. In just 24 hrs. I have felt a lifting in my spirit. I rode my horse, Piper, with Colton today and we just talked and enjoied the beauty of the day. This was a beautiful ride together and a memory I will cherish.
As one life passes, God always seems to send peace in another soul. Today, it came from my son and from my horse Piper... both are His and from Him! To Him I give praises and ask for His strength!
Thanks for caring- D

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Seasons of change

Such a time is this.... how did it become 2010? I still remember partying with the Taylor family at the beach for the millennium... year 2000! Crazy how fast life passes us by regardless if we are engaged or disconnected with it, nonetheless, time is flying!
I was especially reminded of this fact while talking to my cousin yesterday when she asked about my boys. I did the typical run down of events and stopped in mid sentence when I told her Hunter would be in High School next year. How did I, (Denise the forever 25 year old young woman) become old enough (41)to have a rising High School young man?
In this life, we will have many trials as the apostle James reminds us... yes we will face changes some good some bad and some down right terrible, but, in this life, we will face change. I believe it is how we embrace the changes, how we use our faith and how we glorify God in the trials that matters most.
We here at the Hammond farm are facing a very difficult trial regarding Decaza's health. Many of you have prayed for and rejoiced in the mini-miracles regarding Decaza's health. We all realize we have the ability to relieve him of pain at anytime we decide it so.... Our wonderful vet has told us on many occasions to just place the call and he will be here.
I have been placing a daily (hourly) prayers before the great physician and am left with the understanding that the answer may be a "NO", I believe God may be saying, "NO, Denise,allow Decaza to come to me and glorify me in the process". So, it is with tears in my eyes and pains in my heart that we decided to place the call and will watch our beautiful Decaza move from this life on earth and into the arms of his creator. I know he will live pain free with his creator. For God says, He loves his creatures big and small he loves them one and all....
This week we remember the beauty and strength of such an animal. We cherish his sweet and funny attitude most horses do not display. We will feed him candy canes and jolly ranchers and brush his tail and kiss his muzzle. This week we will glorify God by praising and crying with Him, for these years with Decaza and the many life stories that were birthed because of him. We celebrate God's beautiful creation and the creative design that our God possesses! Because of God's artistic design and love for us as humans, I have been blessed once again! To Him I give praise and glory as He upholds me during this trial.
If anyone is reading this and would like to come by to love on Decaza one last time, we welcome you here to our beautiful farm that the Lord has given us! Blessings my friend!
To Him who will never leave or forsake us, I give the glory and praise. Thanks you Lord for hearing my prayers and always bending down to see me eye to eye, heart to heart. Psalm 116 - Denise

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Memories for the Future

Last night was one of the coldest nights in Charlotte history. As my son Colton and his friend Rachel raced to the barn at 5:30 for night time feeding, they were reminded just how cold it actually was. The wind blew and stung their ears and fingers. Despite the fact they were bundled beyond recognition, the cold pierced their bodies to their bones.
Within 15mins. they were inside trying to convince me to bring the goats inside the house. My initial reaction was, "ABSOLUTLY NOT" but as all good and convincing kids do.... they stated the reasons why, acted out the chilled goats behaviors and.... they changed my mind to a resounding "YES" and there you have it..... I/We oficially live in a barn!
They were so excited and so was I. I was able to accomplish one of my 2010 New Years Resolutions. I want to foster and cherish how wonderful each of my children's gifts are. I want to enjoy their passions and allow them to grow in them.
So, check one off my list for Colton. Must this go on all year?
Welcome to my world! Happy New Year and may we all say a few more "yeses" with our children.
Denise